Birth Story

Thursday, May 13

Tomorrow Meilani will be induced and this is the last day we have just for the two of us. It is strange to have played the waiting game for so long and all of a sudden have a set date for Zayden to come. Sander took the day off and together we went on a little roadtrip, visited the Mendenhall glacier, Skater's cabin, the end of the road, hiked down the muddy steep trail to secret beach and ended the day exhausted at the Thai restaurant. If Deana finds out, we are in trouble, as she stressed to Meilani that she had to be on bedrest all day.

Friday, May 14

Too excited to sleep, we finally make it to 6 AM and call the hospital to see if the induction is still on for eight. There is an emergency c-section going on and we have to call back at eight. Meilani does not want to wait much longer and decides it is time for her water to break at 6:15. When we call back at eight they were quickly convinced that it was time for us to come.

The cervix is 1 cm dilated and the contractions are about 12 minutes apart. It promises to be a long day. We share a room with a coughing young mother that is recovering from her c-section. When no progress is made at 2 PM we finally get a room to ourselves and start the petosin meds. Meilani is sitting on a birthing ball and takes the contractions very well.

Every half hour the petosin dose is increased and around 5 PM the pain becomes incredibly intense. The contractions at this point are very close and regular. To our dismay Deana is not with us to help Meilani through labor as planned, because of a family crisis. Dr. Roth has been working like crazy and is at home for a break, so we are in the hands of the nurses. Some of which have been pulled from different departments because the OB ward is so slammed. The timing for us is not impeccable.

Around 8 PM the pain is becoming too much and Meilani is getting nauseous from the petosin. We ask the nurse if she could at least check the cervix, for the first time in twelve hours. No progress whatsoever, not just from this morning but also from an appointment one week ago. We get on the phone with Dr. Roth and decide to stop the petosin and wait for him to come back. We had already discussed c-section before because the ultrasound indicated an 11.5 pound baby, which could be dangerous to deliver. We get on the phone with Deana and when Dr. Roth returns we decide after an intense discussion to go for c-section. The prospect for emergency c-section in the end is 70% with only hard labor to come. We choose life.

Things move incredibly fast now. An entire medical team is ready in a matter of minutes and before we know it we are both in the operating room and I see the knife slice through my wife's lower belly. Meilani is numb up to her chest. I look at Meilani again and when I look back at the belly I see my son's face popping out. Things go so fast. I look back at Meilani and then there is that cry. Our boy Zayden is born! George Brown, our baby doctor cleans him and lays Zayden in Meilani's arms. Eight pounds, 14 ounces. Not eleven and a half. Twenty-one inches long and oh so beautiful. Born at 9:17 PM at Bartlett Hospital in Juneau, Alaska.

I stay with Meilani for a few while dr.Roth who performed the surgery begins to stitch her up. Meilani urges me to go to Zayden who is now in the hands of the nurses. Wanting so dearly to be at both places at the same time, I run back and forth not to miss anything. Around 10 PM I bring Zayden into yet another room where Meilani is situated for the nights to come. A nurse shows us how to get a latch but then flees again, leaving us with a baby, a drugged mom whose hands are obstructed with the IV, and me. Together we manage to breastfeed our child. I call our parents to bring the news and ask them to wait until tomorrow. We are exhausted!

Saterday, May 15

Meilani is asleep or at least I think so. I assist the nurse to take care of Zayden and give him his first bath, check his reflexes and perform the routine hospital procedures. It is 2 AM by the time we get back to Meilani, who is still awake and wondering where the heck we were. Our first night as a family. We barely sleep, and I keep on jumping up to provide my wife with water, a towel, a pillow, bring Zayden for breastfeeding, help with the latch, reposition him, hold his head, put him back in bed only to take him out again. My bed is a pullout chair on the floor and highly uncomfortable anyway.And we are way to excited to sleep.

Zayden is immensely peaceful during the day as he goes from hand to hand to make everybody smile, or cry for that matter. It ends up being an intense day, and when Zayden gets his dosis of injections and tests at night he starts to cry. He does not stop until the next day. We on our hand are getting to the point of total exhaustion and really need our sleep. We take turns, Meilani breastfeeding and Sander walking with him all night long, and he ends up for hours suckling on Meilani's breast. At this time I crash and leave a bad impression on dr. Roth when he visits our room in the early morning with a loud crying baby, an exhaused mom and daddy sound asleep. Oops.

Sunday, May 16

Zayden is still crying and by now has lost 10% of his birth weight. A nurse yells at us for bundling him too warmly and blames us for his discomfort. Grandma exclaims that he looks so cold. A doctor explains that perhaps he is just a fussy baby. We are saved by dr. Brown when he brings over some formula as he thinks that Meilani's milk has not come in yet. Right, we never thought of that. And boy did it work.

We flee the hospital 39 hours after Meilani's c-section as it just did not do it for us. A throbbing headache took the better of me and we are thru with everything and everybody, except for Zayden. Walking the 55 steps to our house is a pain, but Meilani manages and a calmness settles over us. It is amazing to have Zayden home with us. The realization that we are a true family now slowly seeps in like sun warmed honey. Some rest, a well fed Zayden and pain meds for both of us definitely helped too.

Monday, May 17

Finally, a night of sleep! Zayden had almost an entire bottle (2 oz) of formula at 1 AM and slept for 6 hours. He clearly was hungry and exhausted. He will get one more supplement of formula before he survives on breastmilk alone.

It's just amazing what a baby does to your house. Within five minutes of having Zayden at home the sophisticated, wine-lover's appartment is transformed to an undeniable place where children live. Stuff is everywhere! We love it. Sander's parents are taking good care of us by providing lunch and dinner, Meilani's parents by providing other necessities. Above all, the grandparents are about as much in love with our boy as we are.

Dr. Brown made a house visit and did not even need to listen to Zayden's heart beat. He could see from a distance that our boy was healthy! He stayed over for a while and talked with Sander and his parents, with a "kopje koffie" and "beschuit met muisjes". The Dutch traditions go a long way, thanks to Nielske. Meilani got jealous and came down the stairs for the first time to join in on the conversation.

Zayden is entirely at ease in our home and by now we feel like parents and know that we can manage.

Tuesday, May 18

The second night of sleep in our own home. Zayden is sleeping with us in the bed, in his own little "snuggle nest". This night he continues to need a breast feeding every 3 hours and a diaper change. We stay in bed till after 10 AM and actually feel well slept. Just like during pregnancy, Zayden becomes very awake around 11 PM every night but in return sleeps in with us. Clearly our child ;)

We start looking for similarities between Zayden and us. Meilani picks out a picture from when I was a newborn and the similarities are striking. Other than that we have a hard time finding recognizable features. That will probably come as he grows a little older.